As I near completion of my time at school and face into the “real world” beyond my degree, I have been presented with a myriad of large, time-consuming projects that have deadlines that seem to be landing all within hours of each other. Research papers, package designs, final exams, a full-size calendar, a full-size portfolio, and one final group presentation, all due at the same time. Whew!
I’m noticing that I’m feeling a little disoriented about time through all of this. Because I am focused on so many things at once, so many incompletions, so many things “in the process,” I am having difficulties staying aligned to real world time.
The other morning, that looked like this…
Standing in the shower, leaning my forehead against the cool tile and sleeping since I had only had about 5 hours of sleep that night, feeling delirious and kerfuffled. (Eventually remembering I need to actually wash AND rinse my hair.)
A sudden burst of energy and excitement because… IT’S THURSDAY! That means my morning class was cancelled because the professor was out of town. YES! More time to work on my research paper! More time to pull my portfolio together! YES!
Uh… wait… what day IS it???!
Ah crap! It’s Tuesday! I DO have class.
And then… Oh YAY! It’s only Tuesday! Two more days than I thought I had! More time to work on my research paper! More time to pull my portfolio together! YES!
So that’s what it feels like when you’re running out ahead of yourself. Things happen like being ahead of schedule, too early for events – sometimes missing them all together because you have no idea what day it really is – and causing rear-end car accidents because you’re so far ahead of yourself you’re literally up the tail pipe of the person in front of you.
This tail end of my schooling has been a constant practice of being present with myself. Sometimes I do really good at it and feel peaceful, purposeful, calm, and all together. Other times, like Tuesday, I discover I am actually 48 hours ahead of the game.
Where are YOU in time and space?
I always welcome your thoughts, questions, and comments. Feel free to jot down what you’re thinking in the comment box below.