I have been sitting here at my computer for an hour now. Reading through blogs. Emptying emails. Basically frittering away my time. I have been wanting to blog and, having missed yesterday, I feel the hole which I want to fill. Nothing was coming however. So I wasted more time.
My daughter quietly padded into the tiny guest room here, which has become our domain, our protection from the elements. She stood beside the bed, where I sat with my laptop, staring intently at the screen. I was aware she was there, however I was into reading a fellow-blogger’s post about the amazing reading abilities of her preschool-aged daughter on Alice’s Adventures Underground. I was smiling and feeling touched by Alice’s post. And my daughter simply stood there, quiet, patient, waiting.
I looked up at my beautiful, waiting daughter who stood there wrapped in her robe, her hair tussled as though she had been chasing monsters through the sheets. She smiled at me and my heart melted.
“Yes?” I asked her.
She quietly said, “I wanted to invite you to come join me for breakfast.”
“I will be there in a minute,” I heard myself say and heard the other part of myself begin scolding that other self for being so goddamned self-absorbed in that moment. I totally should have jumped my ass right off the bed to go join her. How many more times will I hear that from her?
Her face fell and, wanting to lift it back up, I lamely added, “I am not quite hungry right now. But you can go ahead and eat.”
“No,” she said sweetly. “I will wait for you.”
She exited the room. And, what did I do? I went back to Alice’s Adventures. What the hell is wrong with me?!?!
So, now I have blogged. And I have recorded this stupidity for posterity. And now, now, I am going to go join my baby angel in breaking the fast…