Recently, a long-time and very dear loved one and I had been talking for some time about an account we’re working on together. He was feeling miffed about the direction we were heading and just needed to vent. I had listened, laughed with him, commiserated, and then zinged him with, “Other than this account, how ARE you?”
He had laughed and answered in detail, sharing with me how things are in his life. Then, he had zinged me back, not allowing me to get out of the question, even though I did attempt to dodge.
I wanted to reply with the standard, “fine” or “good,” but something wouldn’t let me. So I took a deep breath and went within. I was thoroughly surprised by what I discovered.
Inside, I was a mess. I felt tumultuous and like a tornado. I felt fear and uncertainty. Even though, on the surface, I was happy and confident, beneath that veneer was a seething storm of discontent and uneasiness. I sat with that for a few moments, checking in to see if I was masking the truth or if I was simply allowing it to be there while I went about my business.
The answer came clear to me and I realized why I had been surprised by what I discovered… I had known it was there a few days ago, I could feel it bubbling and boiling, but that discovery had been in a moment when I couldn’t address it so I had asked for more time, promising I would get back to it.
My friend’s question had brought me back to it, reminding me of the bubbling brew hidden there. When I shared with him about what I was experiencing, he gasped and I laughed.
“Actually,” I said between giggles, “This is a good thing. I recognize this atmosphere as the space I enter when a big shift is near. I don’t know what it is, but I know something is about to happen for me. And those shifts are always amazing. So this IS a great thing!”
For possibly the first time in my life, I viewed this discomfort as a good omen, as something I actually wanted to be experiencing. For the first time that I can remember, I opened up my heart and welcomed in the unforeseeable shift and unnerving sensations I experience as it approaches. I embraced my transformation before it arrived, before I can even begin to imagine the result.
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