I am having an epiphany and you are witness to it.
Yesterday, I wrote about my recent experience with the test between “here” and “get.” Just after writing that, I had a memory of my experience during breakfast. I had actually been writing a different article while I was eating breakfast, so I was not solely focused on the food on my plate.
The awareness that was about to dawn on me had been sneaking into the forefront of my mind for a few weeks now, but it popped open just after posting the “here vs. get” piece. Upon its dawning, I posted the awareness on my Facebook page:
This morning I realized a self-truth… if I eat breakfast while I am writing (contrary to what most “diet” people recommend), when I feel complete with the meal, I have literally eaten only half of what is on my plate. If I focus solely on the meal and consciously choose to eat slowly and savor every bite, I still finish the entire plate of food. I am not the norm.
Once again, I realized that I am not the norm. I don’t fit in the boxes of many “experts” and I have spent a lifetime of frustration attempting to do so. It is something that I see frequently in my clients, especially when it comes to knowing their own body responses to “yes” and “no.” Experts teach that if you stand tall and ask your body a question that you know will be answered with a “yes,” you will sway forward, as though you are leaning into the energy of the question. A “no” will be a backwards sway, as though you are attempting to get away from the energy of the question.
I cannot tell you how many frustrated people I have worked with who have been confused by their own answers because their heart was telling them “yes” but their body sway test was “proving” them wrong because they were swaying backward when they sway tested themselves. When I have clients tell me that they don’t understand muscle testing or sway testing or that they “don’t get answers,” I will invite them to try it with me. 100% of the time, when I’ve done this with clients, we discover that their body responds contrary to the experts’ results.
I even had one client who said to me, “But that’s wrong! So-and-so said I was supposed to sway forward for a yes. My body is screwed up.” I stood in front of her, holding the space of truth for her, but she was unwilling to see it because she had bought into the belief that, because her truth didn’t match that of the “expert,” she was broken.
With tears in my eyes, I asked her, “Is it possible that your response isn’t actually wrong but is, instead, different?”
When I asked her that, her eyes grew big and it was as though someone had opened a bottomless gift of mystery. She wanted to resist the possibility, but it was too delicious. Suddenly, she was willing to look at the possibility that she wasn’t wrong, but was, instead, different.
When you are outside the norm, there will be many who will want you to conform to the norm. There will be many who don’t “understand” you because you don’t look like, operate like, think like, speak like, move like, or behave like the norm. Thing is, the “norm” is an elusive thing that is ever-changing and is declared by those who are “in” that “norm.”
Cell phones are an awesome example of this. These days, nearly everyone in the US has at least one cell phone in their household. That is the norm. However, personal handheld, wireless phones were not available until the 90’s; before that, our norm was tied to landlines. Now, to not have a landline is the norm and to not have a cell phone is outside the norm.
So, today, my awareness is this… I spent so much of my life trying to be “normal” and feeling miserable the entire time. Now, I recognize that my propensity to be outside the norm is part of my Purpose. Through the experience of my life, I have developed compassion and understanding for others who are outside the “norm.” It has helped me to see where others may be trying to “fit in,” although there really is no need. It has also supported me in developing the ability to support another in uncovering their unique truths. So, in the end, being not normal is a blessing and, for me, it is normal!
I always welcome your thoughts, questions, and comments.
Feel free to jot down what you’re thinking in the comment box below.