Image courtesy of Julia Margaret Cameron and linked to originating site

Image courtesy of Julia Margaret Cameron and linked to originating site

You’ve had an argument. You’ve said some things you wished you wouldn’t have. You know you hurt the other person and this knowing hurts you even more. You’ve since gotten accountable and have apologized. It seems the other person has forgotten it and merrily moved on their way, but you are in pain. This pain confuses you.

The other person said or did things that really hurt your feelings too. Maybe this is why you’re still hurting, you wonder.

When you seek their understanding for how you feel and approach them about it, they rationalize what they did or said and clearly explain that it was justifiable. They share with you their point of view, telling you why they did what they did and why they were right. They are sad they hurt you. They apologize for hurting you, ending with, “But I had a right to behave the way I did.”

Thing is, you’re a Sensitive, so you already know all this. You already can see their point of view. You already understood why they did what they did because you could feel what they were feeling in the moment. You’ve already looked at all the angles, felt all the feelings, and understood all the beliefs, programs, and behaviors. You already know that they feel they have a right to behave the way they did. You can see why they think they had that right. You can see how the pattern began for them, all the way back to the beginning. You understand it all. It’s what you do. You’re a Sensitive.

And, still, you’re hurting.

The thing about being a Sensitive is that you can do and feel all that is described up there. You have an ability to feel an infinite depth of empathy for those around you and often tend to allow them grand leeway in the the benefit of the doubt department. You are usually 22 steps ahead of the non-Sensitive because you’ve been present to witness everything that is going on in the situation – and you’ve done all that through your own body and senses.

And because you are so magical and powerful, you forget that others are not as sensitive. You forget that other humans have forgotten who they are and they’re not open to their abilities. Because it is second nature for you to look at all the viewpoints in any given situation, you forget that “normal” humans usually can only see their own viewpoint and usually choose to only look from that viewpoint.

As a Sensitive, you’re going to often find yourself feeling dissatisfied with arguments that end like this. Those who are not tuned in, as you are, are unaware of all you’re feeling. They’re unaware that you’ve already understood where they’re coming from and that you’ve already seen their side of things. They don’t know that you can do this and that you do do this – sometimes at the expense of yourself.

Sensitives have a tendency to be very forgiving of those around them because of their ability to see multiple viewpoints at once. Because of this, they often forget that they have a viewpoint and although they are incredibly magical, they are still living in a human body that has human emotions that sometimes get hurt. Sometimes Sensitives sacrifice their own experience in the name of honoring humans around them, leaving one very important person out of the equation of humanity: themselves.

So what do you do when your pain is not honored?

First of all, you cannot expect the Muggles to understand your pain because they do not look at the world like you do. Stop asking them to do the impossible. Most of them are not in touch with their own emotional experience, let alone that of those around them, so asking them to understand your pain is like dropping a deaf and blind man in the middle of Zambia and expecting him to communicate without any training in Swahili.

Therefore, it is your responsibility to resolve your own pain. While you can understand other’s pain, you need to offer that same understanding to yourself. Honor your pain. Allow yourself to cry, if you need to, and vent to a trusted source. For a Sensitive, verbal or written processing is a powerful tool.

Secondly, get radically accountable for your own behaviors. Look at what you did in the situation and love yourself for screwing up. Sensitives have a tendency to be really tough on themselves because they should “know better.” But, just so you know, that is utter bullshit because you are living in a human body on a planet that is ruled by the human class and the human ego. Therefore, although you are enlightened and aware of more than a lot of humans around you, you are not by any means, infallible. If you were, you wouldn’t be on this planet. You’re here to experience life and this means screwing up.

Therefore, you need to take into account where you could have behaved more lovingly, what would a be gentler way to handle similar situations in the future, forgive yourself, and pour some lovin’ on you.

Thirdly, remember how divinely amazing you are. You are a Sensitive and you, in all your glory, are much needed on this planet at this time. Thank you for being willing to feel and honor the pain of others and of yourself.

 

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